


An Unexpected Gift

by Desertpoet



Series: Embracing Chaos [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Gen, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Loki is John Watson, Odin's A+ Parenting, Soul Bond, Wrongful Imprisonment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-24
Updated: 2016-02-24
Packaged: 2018-05-22 23:28:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6097436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Desertpoet/pseuds/Desertpoet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki despairs of never seeing his soul mate again, and then he is given an unexpected gift.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Unexpected Gift

**Author's Note:**

> N.B. This story is gen because it focuses on Tony's childhood. Loki and Tony still have strong connection, however it is a friendship for the time being. There is no underage sexual content of any kind.
> 
> This story is full of angst and once again I don't promise a happy ending. There will be at least one more story.
> 
> Betaed by the lovely Rowaine

**Part 1**

For the eighth time since his incarceration Loki was dragged out of his cell, bound and dragged into Odin All-Father’s throne room, where his former father, his mother and brother were all waiting for him. Loki was tired and weak, despite his regular exercise regimen.  The loneliness of his solitary confinement was taking its toll. It had been eighty years since Sherlock, his beloved, had been taken from him.

Eighty years since he had been imprisoned like a criminal, by Odin All-Father. He blinked in the brightness of the chamber as his eyes adjusted to the much bolder light. Despite knowing exactly what was to happen, he was grateful for a break from the monotony of his existence. He heard the whispers, and even some jeers and catcalls, as he was thrown onto his knees at his former father’s feet.

In attendance at Loki’s trial were all the people of Asgard assembled to witness his most recent humiliation. Loki did not allow his aggravation to show on his face. He would not permit any of these people to see how run down and desperate he was truly feeling. He must appear strong. He didn’t know why Odin continued to perpetrate this ridiculous farce when it always ended the exact same way. His father enjoyed all the pomp and circumstance of the occasion. As always, as Loki looked at them, his brother could not meet his eyes and his mother met his gaze but did not even offer as much as a smile of encouragement. Despite the pain of this, he was pleased to note his mother looked well, as wise and beautiful as ever.

He turned his attention back to his father, whose gaze was cold and powerful. In contrast to his mother, Odin looked old and worn. Loki couldn’t help but be glad to see his former father looking so careworn. Still seated on his throne, Loki was forced to admit Odin looked every bit the King he was, however weary he seemed.

There was a time when Loki would have been in awe of him, would have been so proud to know he was his son. Now all he felt was anger and something that was very close to hate. Even now, after everything he had done, he could not bring himself to hate his former father completely, no matter how often he berated himself for a fool part of him still admired Odin, and was sad at the loss of paternal approval and affection.

Loki forced himself to pay attention to the King’s words, although they were almost always the same, time and time again.

“Loki Odinson, you have suffered another ten years of punishment. You have now been incarcerated for eighty long years. I hope this time has been put to good use. Before I ask you the question I have brought you here to answer, I will give you a chance to speak for yourself. Do you have anything to say?” his father sounded grave but he couldn’t completely hide the knowing smugness in his tone. The bastard was enjoying himself. He looked forward to watching Loki squirm, to seeing Loki so worn and defeated.

Loki didn’t answer. He glared at his father, silent in his defiance. His father paused for several seconds, waiting, feining great interest and anticipation for Loki’s answer. When it wasn’t forthcoming he frowned deeply and sighed with disappointment. Loki stifled the urge to role his eyes at his father’s theatrics. Honestly, how many more times must he be forced to endure this circus?

His father continued in a serious tone, “Loki Odinson, you have had time to consider the gravity of your actions. Do you repent for attacking your father, and one true ruler of Asgard?” Without giving him a chance to answer, his father continued, “Do you renounce your connection to the human soul formerly known as Sigyn of Asgard?”

Loki froze in disbelief, sure he’d heard wrong. He was truly shocked for the first time in centuries. He heard his mother and brother gasp in disbelief as well. His father had never asked him to renounce his soul mate before. What game was Odin playing? Then the surprise wore off and Loki was incandescent with rage. How dare his father drag Sigyn’s name into this. A soul mate bond was a rare and precious gift. Asking Loki to renounce it, and publically at that, was obscene. The crowd began to murmur amongst themselves in shock. Odin had gone too far this time, and everyone recognized it.

The first two times he had been called before his father, Loki had taken the opportunity to plead his case. Foolishly hoping his father might be willing to listen to reason. He had quickly realized his father had no real interest in anything he had to say. He simply wanted to rub salt in Loki’s wounds while appearing to be a strong and magnanimous ruler.

Loki glared angrily. “Go to hell, old man. Must I remind you I am no longer your son? You may not renounce me, but I certainly renounce you,” he spit out through clenched teeth. “I will never renounce my soul mate. Sigyn is now and will forever be the best part of me. In any form, she is my other half and truest love. To renounce her would be worse than death itself. A soul mate is a gift from destiny, and not something to be cast aside on a whim or order of a _renowned King_.”

Odin could not miss the derision that dripped from his words or the intended insult.

“That you would dare to even ask this question of me proves that you are growing feeble in your old age,” he sneered. “As for attacking you, I refuse to repent for an action for which I am most proud. Seeing you lying in a heap on the floor is one of the greatest moments of my life.”

He grinned impishly at the memory. Loki was truly amused for the first time in what felt like ages. The memory of his mischief made him feel more himself. However, he did not dare look away from his former father’s face. He knew the reminder had the intended effect. He noticed the way his eyes narrowed and his lips formed a thin line, but otherwise he remained composed. Only one who knew him well would recognize how angry he truly was.

“So be it,” Odin said coldly. “Due to your own stubbornness you have condemned yourself to passing at least another ten years in your prison. Pray that my good will returns by the time another decade has passed or you may find yourself locked in there permanently, with no hope of release or escape.”

His father ordered him taken away and turned his back. Loki looked toward the rest of his family, and to his surprise his mother’s gaze met and held his. It only lasted a few seconds, but he saw compassion and affection in her eyes, and despite himself Loki felt a flicker of hope.

Loki was dragged back down to the dungeon. His restraints were removed and he was thrown back into his cell. He was unable to maintain his footing and hit the floor hard.

Loki was still furious. Turn his back on his soul mate? How dare Odin suggest such a horrible thing! Loki understood Odin was waiting for him to weaken enough to give in. Everything in his heart, in his soul, cried out against such a horrible betrayal of his soul mate, for that’s what it would be. Sigyn, his beloved wife, had died for them, and Loki could not bring himself to cast her sacrifice aside for his own gain in word or deed.

Desperate for freedom as he might be, he could not bring himself to agree to Odin’s proposition. In the back of his mind a traitorous voice whispered _at least not yet_. He told himself he never would, but he feared his sanity was beginning to fray. He did not know how much longer he could live like this, with no human contact. Decades spent alone with nothing but his thoughts and memories for company, and the possibility of centuries more to come

He remembered his mother’s acknowledgement, and traitorous hope filled his heart. Perhaps he was not as alone as he’d thought. Perhaps Odin did not allow her to visit. Perhaps she still cared. Loki could do nothing but wait and see.

Meanwhile, his memories of his mate would continue to sustain him, keep him sane and whole. Dozens of lifetimes ran constantly through his mind. He had only to close his eyes and he could relive them for hours, escaping this horrible place if only in his thoughts and dreams. He dreamed of his soul mate most nights. It wasn’t the big, important events that stood out most often, but the small every day moments that were the most vivid. Hours spent together, in conversation, sharing a meal or making love. Peaceful moments spent together with the person he loved, those were the memories he cherished most.

His only joy lay in knowing that one day his soul mate would be reborn. He had clung to the knowledge like a lifeline. He’d also imagined what his soul mate would be like in his or her next life. Perhaps this time she’d be a woman again. Not that Loki cared one way or the other. He reminded himself that he needed to be patient. Sigyn would return, and when she did their bond would come alive once more. Loki had to stay strong and watchful.

He would find a way to escape, and he needed to be ready. His soul mate would live and grow into adulthood without him, but that had happened many times before. Destiny had always guided him to his soul mate before - he had to believe it would again. He would see his love again, at the perfect time. He resolved to double his exercise in the meantime; it would keep him fit and help him pass the time. Loki snorted to himself in amusement. Pass the time, indeed. The Norns knew he had little else.

That night as Loki slept there was a swell of magic, and if he had been awake he would have seen a beautiful sight appear. Hovering outward from his chest, over his heart, beautiful and once again full of life were two threads, one gold and one silver bound tightly together, inseparable in life and death. They glowed in the darkness. For the first time since Sherlock’s murder, Loki did not visit the past in his dreams, instead he dreamed of the lonely cries of a newborn child.

****

New York, New York, United States of America, Midgard, May 29, 1970

At that very same moment, Anthony Edward Stark came screaming into the world, announcing himself with a loud cry. He was a beautiful baby born healthy and strong, the pride and joy of both his parents. His father swore that his eyes already shown with the Stark intelligence. He was sure Tony would be everything he ever hoped for in a son. Tony would achieve great things and follow in his father’s footsteps. However, what Howard did not foresee was that Tony would also grow in loneliness and with an inexplicable feeling of loss in his heart.

 

**Part 2**

Months passed, one day the same as the next, but Loki did not continue to weaken as his father had assumed or surely hoped he would. Instead he endured and grew stronger in his resolve, and in physical strength. The soul bond throbbed and thrived once again, though he no longer had sufficient magic to see it. Odin had insured that Loki got only the minimum amount of magic needed to survive, and his ability to funnel it was severely limited. However, he could feel the soul bond warm and alive, pulsing with energy inside himself. Although he could not follow it, he could feel his soul mate’s presence at the other end - a shining light that pierced the darkness of his bleak existence.

However, it was not the only hope Loki found that he could cling to. Every night he continued to dream of his soul mate, but not just of their past lives as he always had - occasionally Loki dreamed of the present. He got to share in moments of his soul mate’s current life. He didn’t know if the dreams were real or simply figments of his imagination, but he did not care. Despite the fact that his soul mate was still a baby, Loki was happy to be able to observe them and spend time with him or her. It was quite vexing, he reflected, not to be certain of his mate’s gender. Truly, it felt strange, but surprisingly intriguing to see his mate so young and innocent. So different, and yet the same all at once. His mate was generally a very pleasant child.

Loki did not know how it had happened, but he was not going to question such a precious gift lest the dreams disappear. He lived for those dreams, although they were often hazy and sparse. He lived for the all-too brief glimpses into his soul mate’s current life. It made Loki feel more alive to be near him or her, even if only in a dream. He also worried, although he told himself it was pointless.

He worried because every time he saw the baby he was always alone. Surely this was not normal, even on Midgard. He knew humans cared as much for their young as most species did, and a baby needed constant care. Where were his parents? Perhaps it was Loki’s subconscious removing all but his mate from his mind. Loki did not believe even he was that selfish, to wish a baby be abandoned for his benefit. He had to believe, however, that the dreams were at least somewhat representative of reality. How else could Loki dream of places he’d never been before?

This night, Loki dreamed he was in a nursery. The dream was far more detailed than usual. He looked down at himself and saw he was wearing not his usual torn filthy clothing, but instead he wore a pair of comfortable blue trousers and a soft cotton shirt. _Clothing appropriate for the time and location_ , he assumed, _interesting_. He could feel the thick carpet under his feet, and make out many aspects of the room in the pre-dawn light. It was a large room filled with anything and everything a young child could need, but his attention was drawn to the crib by the sound of the baby’s cries. Loki felt a rush of anger, and all his protective instincts rose up and demanded he act. Who had left his soul mate all alone? Couldn’t anyone hear his cries of distress? He walked over to the crib and looked down.

The baby stopped crying immediately and looked at Loki with interest. He looked to be several months old, perhaps six or seven. From what he remembered, human babies were generally smaller and developed more slowly than Asgardians did. Loki looked down into the familiar eyes of his soul mate and smiled at him, feeling a rush of real happiness.

He had never seen his soul mate at such a young age, but as always he was charmed. He thought the baby was adorable. He wondered again if his mate was a boy or a girl. He saw the baby’s pajamas were blue but that didn’t tell him much. Then he noticed a name carved elegantly into the side of the crib, Anthony - his soul mate’s name was Anthony. “Anthony,” he said, tasting the way it felt on his tongue. It was a good strong name, he decided, one worthy of his mate.

Apparently tired of being stared at, Anthony began to cry. Loudly. His little face was red with his displeasure. Loki couldn’t help but smile indulgently. “You always have been very sure of what you want and making your opinions known, little one. If you are hungry, I’m afraid I can be of little assistance in the matter. You doubtless want to be held, don’t you?”

Loki hesitated for a moment, unsure what to do. He wanted to pick Anthony up and comfort him, but could he? He had never interacted physically with anything in his dreams before. Dreams were really very insubstantial things. Could he pick the child up? He stood and stared down at Anthony, unsure what to do. Then Anthony let out a particularly loud and plaintive wail, and Loki could not stand to see his mate in such distress. There was only one way to find out. “All right, it’s been a long time since I’ve done this so be patient with me. You always were good at that, often much more than I deserved,” he added wryly as he bent down and picked the baby up, tucking him securely into his arms and rocking him gently.

He was surprisingly warm and solid in Loki’s arms. “Shhh, dearest, it’s alright. I’ve got you now, everything is fine.” He checked the diaper and was relieved to find it dry. It had been centuries since Loki had changed a soiled diaper, and he didn’t fancy the idea of changing his mate’s for him. As he continued to rock him, Anthony began to quiet, still making the occasional whimper but his attention was already turning to Loki’s hair. He reached out in an attempt to grab it but Loki offered his finger instead. Loki looked around and saw a rocking chair.

He removed a rather large stuffed toy from it, and then he sat down and gently rocked them both. Anthony continued to look at him avidly. Loki frowned in thought as he contemplated the boy.

“I certainly hope that in the real world you have someone to take care of you properly,” he informed Anthony. “The idea of you being left alone like this is most upsetting to me. Particularly, since I am not currently in a position to assist you or take your caregivers to task for shirking their duties. ” Didn’t Tony have a nanny? It was obvious he wanted for nothing when it came to possessions. Loki’s heart broke at the thought of his mate growing up without affection. He would be more observant in the future; he hoped the dreams continued to be this detailed and informative.

Loki leaned back in the rocking chair; through the window he could see the sky lightening, as dawn was almost upon them. He felt warm and pleasantly drowsy. _It's wonderful to feel the sun once again, even if it is a fantasy_ , he thought. However, he couldn’t deny this dream felt different from the others he’d had of the past or the present. This dream was so vivid he could almost believe it was real, that he was really comforting his soul mate. He rocked Anthony for a while, talking to him. Anthony cooed and blew bubbles at him, seemly content to be in his company. It was a comfort to know some things never changed.

His little mouth moved in response to Loki’s voice and his eyes followed his movements. Loki could almost believe that Anthony was able to understand him and follow along, that his soul mate trusted him and he wasn’t just a pair of arms and a warm body to hold him close. He clearly felt safe enough with Loki. Loki was filled with a burning fervent hope that he was right and that the dreams were based in reality. He prayed to the Norms for the first time in many years that he was worthy of such an amazing gift.

Loki sang a long-forgotten song his mother had sung to him and Thor to get them to sleep at night when they were very young. He smiled at the memory. Other memories of other children he’d held in his arms threatened to break free from where he kept them locked away but he pushed them aside. Now was not the time. He did not wish to interrupt the first peaceful moment he’d had in many years. Loki sat and enjoyed the sunshine until the baby fell asleep once again. Suddenly, he heard footsteps coming down the hall. He was relieved someone was coming to check on Anthony, though it was too little too late as far as he was concerned. He felt a sudden urge to hide, that it was urgent he not be seen. He rose and quickly replaced the baby in the crib.

Once he was certain his soul mate was safe and comfortable, he turned and looked for a place to hide. Why he was so certain he shouldn’t allow himself to be seen, he wasn’t sure. He only knew it was important. This was his dream after all, wasn’t it? He supposed he would simply have to accept the extraordinary circumstances and heed the warning where ever it came from. However, before he could think about the strangeness of the situation anymore, the dream began to fade away. The last thing he saw was a rather large woman in a maid’s uniform, entering his soul mate’s room.

Loki awoke with a start, and a feeling of loss. He was sorry the dream was over, but he had much to think about. The night had certainly been an eventful one full of unexpected occurrences. For once Loki was grateful he had so much time alone with his thoughts. He snorted - perhaps this was the most unexpected thing of all. If anyone had been watching they would have been shocked to see Loki laughing alone in the perpetual darkness of his cell, and wonder if he’d finally lost his mind.

 

**Part 3**

August 1975

Tony leaned over the big work bench, and struggled to hold the pliers in his small hands. He was almost finished. Tony squirmed with excitement; his father was going to be so proud of him, and then he’d see Tony was smart enough to keep up with him. Maybe he’d even give Tony space in his work shop so he could work on his own projects. As far as Tony was concerned the workshop was the best, most fun place on Earth, maybe the whole universe, unless there were spaceships out there. A spaceship would be so rad!

Tony was so busy concentrating that he didn’t hear the lab door open, or his father’s footsteps, until suddenly his father was looming over him.

“Tony!” his father yelled, very angry as he strode around the long work table, his long legs eating up the distance. “What are you doing in here? I’ve told you time and again, not to come in here!”

Tony didn’t react to his father’s yelling; he was used to it by now. Besides as soon as his father saw what he’d done, how he’d helped, everything would be fine.

His father looked down to see what Tony was working on and his face turned bright red. Despite being in trouble, Tony fought the urge to giggle. His dad always looked so funny, face red like a tomato. His father grabbed Tony off the chair he had been using to see over the work bench, and set him on the floor, so quickly Tony stumbled a little.

“Look what you’ve done, you little troublemaker. You’ve destroyed a month of work with this stunt! I’ve told you time and again to stay out of my workshop! If this is just a bid for attention, it isn’t going to work. I will not reward bad behavior.”

“But, Dad. Listen!" Tony said, still excited despite his father’s yelling. “I fixed it for you. Look! Just look!” Tony bounced in barely contained anticipation.

He pointed toward the circuit board, his father’s latest project in his quest to find Captain America. “See,” he said eagerly, “these wires were in the wrong place. That’s why it wouldn’t work like you wanted. I fixed it for you! The range should be twice what it was!” he shouted, unable to control his excitement. “Try it!” he urged his father again. Tony just knew that when his father saw how he’d upgraded the circuity he would be so excited.

His father scoffed at him instead, and with barely a glance at Tony’s work he removed the wires, and then continued to undo all of Tony’s hard work. Without looking up, he said, “Tony, how many times have I told you not to touch my things. These are not toys. You could have been hurt, and as it is you’ve ruined weeks of work that I’m going to have to redo.”

Tony tried one last time to explain, “But Dad, it’ll work. I know-”

His father cut him off. “I said that’s enough. Maria!” His father shouted. When he got no response and Tony’s mom didn’t appear to whisk him away, his father ran his fingers through his hair and gave an aggravated sigh. “Of course, your mother is out with her ridiculous friends. Why is she never around when I need to work?”

Tony knew the question wasn’t directed at him so he stayed quiet. “Where is the nanny? I swear I don’t know why I pay that woman. Lord knows, she has no control over you. You know better than to sneak in here. Why can't you ever behave properly? You’re grounded. Go to your room!”

Tony was heartbroken. He knew his father didn’t believe him but Tony knew his idea was solid. He knew it would save his father a lot of time. If only he would listen. However, he knew that there would be no way his father would listen to him when he was this angry.

So he turned and walked - not ran - out of the workshop. He knew running inside the workshop was too dangerous. He was old enough to help and he could be responsible enough to work with his dad. Why didn’t his father trust him enough to let Tony help him? He should know Tony better than this!

Tony did not allow his tears to fall until he was well away from the workshop. His father hated when Tony cried and he’d only yell more. He knew tears would only gain him frowns and a lecture on why “Stark men did not cry”.

Tony ran down the hall, tears falling down his face, and hid under the bed. He knew Jarvis would come find him eventually, or perhaps his imaginary friend would come instead. At least Jarvis said he was imaginary but Tony wasn’t sure. His friend acted like he was real but so far no one besides Tony could see him. His friend was a mystery Tony was going to solve, someday. He was even secretly working on an Imaginary friend detector, IMD for short. He couldn’t tell anyone about his plans so it was slow going.

Suddenly, Tony felt the familiar tingling in his chest, right over his heart, and knew his friend was nearby. Tony looked up from where he was huddled under the bed as the tall man with dark hair looked under the bed and beckoned him out from his hiding spot. Tony slowly crawled out and sat crossed legged on the floor. The thick carpet made a comfortable seat. John nodded in approval and then sat down next to him, mirroring his pose.

John was unlike any adult Tony knew. Sometimes he wished his friend was a little like him, but when he’d asked his friend had laughed and said he’d already grown up a long time ago. Tony had decided it didn’t really matter; his friend was pretty fun anyway.

He liked that his friend never towered over him and always met his eyes when they spoke. He treated Tony like what he said mattered. He always paid attention to what he said, and took Tony’s opinions seriously.

Even when he thought Tony was being funny he never made him feel stupid or unimportant, not like his father or his father’s friends. All of whom sometimes laughed at Tony. Tony was already smart enough to know when he was being laughed at and it hurt. John never laughed at him like that.

When he visited, he didn’t always speak to Tony, which had confused him at first, but then he’d seen John put his hand through the desk. Tony realized that John didn’t know that Tony could see him all the time and he’d decided not to tell him. He didn’t know why John was a ghost sometimes  and other times he came and told stories, and played fun games, and gave him hugs. What if he got angry like daddy did when Tony knew something he didn’t and went away?

It was hard for Tony to keep ghost John a secret because he really wanted to know how John did it! He had so many questions but so far he’d kept them mostly to himself. He was so curious, wanting to know everything about his friend. Besides Jarvis, John was Tony’s only friend. He didn’t want to scare him away by being bad.

According to his dad, he was bad almost all the time, but Tony didn’t mean to be so annoying!

His friend was here, and he would make everything better. Tony was happy to see him and smiled - his sadness and disappointment momentarily forgotten.

“John,” he shouted happily. “I knew you'd be here.”

His friend smiled kindly as always. “What has happened? Why are you crying, Anthony,” he asked gently, his tone affectionate.

Tony giggled. He liked the way John said "Anthony". No one else called him by his full name, and it made Tony feel warm and safe, every time.

He sniffled a little. “I was only trying to help!” He defended himself.

“Ah, that tells me you did something you knew was wrong. What kind of mischief have you gotten into now, hmm?” Despite the chiding. John’s voice was warm with amusement.

“I fixed Dad’s project for him! I know I’m not allowed in the work shop but I could see it in my head, and it wouldn’t leave me alone. It really wouldn’t and I knew I had to fix it, and I did. The sensor would work so much better now, but my dad said I ruined it. I swear I didn't!”

John frowed. "You went into your father's workshop without permission again, didn't you? Anthony, we’ve talked about this. You know how dangerous the work room is. I know you get excited and forget the rules but you must be more careful. You are a brilliant boy but you are still only 5 years old.”

“5 and a half,” Tony corrected quickly. “I’ll be six soon. I’m almost grown up,” he protested indignantly.

John laughed softly. “Oh, excuse me. Almost six is very grown up indeed, but still I think you have a few more years before you’re all grown up. That isn’t a bad thing. You have your whole life to do amazing things but being a child only lasts for a little while. Enjoy it.”

Tony wrinkled his nose He wasn’t sure about that. Being so little was often no fun, and if he was bigger he could use his father’s tools whenever he wanted. John must have seen his expression because he smiled and said, “I promise you’ll be grown up before you know it.”

Tony nodded but it couldn’t happen soon enough as far as he was concerned. He remembered the look on his dad’s face and whispered, “My dad was really really angry, and he wouldn’t even look at me.”

"You were hoping to impress him,” his friend guessed. Tony almost never had to explain things to John. His friend always seemed to understand him, sometimes even before Tony did himself.

It wasn’t a question but Tony nodded anyway. “I wanted to help him find Captain America, his old friend. He talks about him all the time. If he’s not out looking for him then he’s trying to invent new ways to find him. I sneaked a look at his latest design after I heard him complain to Mother about it and I just knew how to fix it.  I tried to tell him but he wouldn’t listen.“

“So you thought you’d show him how to fix it, am I right?”

“Yes. I thought he’d be as excited as I was but he wasn’t. I know he misses Steve, that’s Captain America’s real name. He was a hero!”

John nodded in understanding. Tony talked about Captain America a lot.

“I thought if I helped, he’d like me more, and then he'd want to spend more time with me,” Tony admitted quietly.  “Does he think I’m too stupid to do the work the right way?” Tony asked and his voice shook a little. His chest hurt at the thought. Tony sighed and felt his shoulders slump.

His friend made a pained noise, and reached out to pull Tony into a hug. “Your father doesn’t think you’re stupid. He knows how smart you are. Although he could show it better,” John muttered the last bit more to himself. Tony was smart enough to know he was supposed to pretend he hadn’t heard.

“He was most likely scared for your safety, and sometimes when people get scared, they get angry and yell. Working with tools is very dangerous. He doesn’t want you to hurt yourself.”

That wasn’t fair. “But I wasn’t using the soldering iron!” Tony quickly assured John. “I promised you I wouldn’t do that again. I was only showing dad where the new wires should go.”

John shuddered at the mention of the time he’d caught Toy trying to use the soldering iron. “Thank the Norns for that. I’m proud of you for keeping your promise and staying safe.” He reached out and ruffled Tony’s hair, laughing when Tony glared at him in displeasure and attempted to fix his hair.

“It was kind of difficult, but I managed it anyway,” he confided proudly.

John smiled but said seriously, “I appreciate the sacrifice you made.” Tony nodded happily. It really had been a sacrifice on his part.

Tony leaned on John’s shoulder. He had a question and he knew his friend would do his best to be honest. “If he knows I’m smart, and he likes me, then why doesn’t my dad ever listen to me the way you and Jarvis do?”

John sighed heavily. “Sometimes adults get really caught up in things they think are more important than everything else around them. They forget to pay attention to other important people in their lives. I’m afraid your father is so obsessed with finding his old friend, this Steve person, that he can’t focus on anything else.”

Tony nodded, thinking it over. Finally he smiled. “He’s like that dad, in that movie I saw with Jarvis, Mary Poppins. The dad was so obsessed with his job he never had time for his kids.” That did make sense.

John shrugged. “I don’t know what a movie is but I believe your analogy is sound.”

Tony’s eyes grew wide. “You’ve never seen a movie? I’ll have to show you some times. It’s like a play. Do you know what that is?” he checked.

“Yes.” John laughed. “I know what a play is, little one. I’m not completely ignorant.”

Tony nodded loyally. John was really smart!

“It’s too bad Mary Poppins can’t come here, and help dad. She could make him like me with her magic. Except that she’s fictional, of course. That means she doesn’t really exist and neither does magic,” he added glumly.

John looked almost angry for a moment and then he opened his mouth, but then closed it. Tony wanted to ask what he’d been going to say but knew he wouldn’t get an answer. John said some things were too adult for them to talk about. It was very frustrating but Tony tried to accept it graciously.

“I’m sorry your plan to impress your father didn’t work, little one. Perhaps you could try again another day, when you haven’t done anything to make him angry.” Tony wasn’t sure that would ever happen - his dad was always angry with him, it seemed.

“Maybe,” he said doubtfully. “It’s just that I have all these ideas, and my mind is constantly running and I can’t turn it off. I want to get them out, but I can’t. My dad is a genius, like me, and I thought he’d understand.”

John sighed again. His face was dark as he muttered something angrily under his breath that Tony didn’t hear. He knew John wasn’t angry at him but probably at his father. Tony knew John didn’t like the way his father treated him, although he never said so to Tony.

He suddenly looked very sad. “I know what it’s like to want parental approval and not get it. I’m sorry, little one, I know how much it hurts.” Then his face cleared and he grinned at Tony. It lit up his whole face.

“As much as I wish I could, I can’t make your father pay attention to you, but you can share your ideas with me. I can’t promise to understand it all but I’m sure I can follow most of it. You know I enjoy hearing about them. I have an idea - why don’t you ask Jarvis to get you a notebook, and you can write all your ideas down so you don’t forget. It will help you clear your mind. How does that sound?”

Tony nodded excitedly. He’d been reading since he was three and writing since he was four.

“That’s a far out idea,” he shouted happily. John winced at his loud shout. His expression made Tony giggle. John had lots of great ideas! “I’ll go ask him right now.” He got up and ran out of the room to ask Jarvis for the notebook.

It was only after when he went looking for his friend flushed with happiness and success because Jarvis had readily agreed to his request that he realized John was gone again. Tony pouted. He’d wanted to tell John about his idea for the robot he wanted to build some day but he hadn’t had the chance. Then he shrugged it off as only a child could. He was sure John would come back, he always did, whenever Tony needed him. He was Tony's best friend, after all. Best friends stuck together.

 

**Part 4**

May 1977

Loki sat cross legged on the floor, attempting to meditate. His surroundings were not the problem, he had long since become used to the cold and darkness. In truth, he had always preferred the cold. Too much heat had always made him quite uncomfortable. He wondered if his father had remembered, or if he had only inadvertently done Loki this favor. It was probably safe to assume that if his father had remembered his aversion to excessive heat, his cell would be blazingly hot.

Loki cursed his inane thoughts. What did his comfort matter now? What difference could it make? Perhaps his faculties had finally begun to erode from lack of stimulation, as he had often feared they would. He needed to clear his mind and relax, but no matter how hard he tried he could not manage to do so. It had been more than six months since he’d dreamed of Anthony.

Since the dreams had begun he has never gone so long between dreams of his soul mate’s current incarnation. Being separated from him caused Loki to worry constantly.  Having no way to contact the boy was maddening. He was truly powerless against the whims of fate it seemed. Would he never be able to determine his own future?

Loki sighed in frustration and rubbed his hand over his face. His thoughts were spinning in circles without an end in sight. If only he had some way to distract himself - books, paper and pencils. Hell, he’d even scratch on the walls but the metal that made up his cell was impenetrable by any means magical or mortal. The smallest scratch instantly repaired itself.

Loki knew this because the first several months of his captivity he had exhausted himself trying to break them. In retrospect of course wasting so much magic had been a large mistake on his part, but because of his rage and grief he had not been thinking clearly. By the time he’d come back to himself the damage had been done.

It also had not occurred to him that his father would keep him cut off from the magic of Asgard so completely. He simply had not imagined that any magical being could deny another something so integral to them. He had not imagined his father could be so cruel, much to his own detriment. He snorted in bitter self-derision. It did not escape his notice that no matter what his father did to him, no matter what atrocities he committed against him, Loki could not help but hope for better treatment from him.

The memories of the man who had shown him affection as a child had continued to foster hope in Loki’s heart that one day he would again have his father’s love. What a fool he had been. The disappointment and pain his father caused him should not have surprised him, but it had. His blind spot when it came to his father’s cruelty had cost Loki his soul mate.

He had not been able to save Sherlock’s life and he had been taken before his time. In a way his imprisonment had done what no other act had been able to - Loki had finally stopped hoping his father would eventually turn a new leaf, and come to love him. Odin had indeed finally taught Loki a very important lesson.

It was one of the main reasons he worried so much for Anthony. He had so little affection in his life. A kind but distant mother who was rarely at home, and a father who barely ever even noticed him, and when he did treated Anthony with contempt and dismissed him like he would a dog. To make matters worse Loki believed Edward Stark was prone to drinking to excess.

Anthony had complained innocently that his father often smelled bad, and he had quickly learned when to stay as far away from his father as he could, so as not to be the focus of the man’s drunken rages. Loki had made sure the man had never hit Anthony but his tongue was sharp, and words carried their own special kind of pain. Loki was furious but he was almost powerless. All he could do was be as supportive as possible.

Loki believed that part of the reason the dreams had been given to him was so that he could make sure Anthony grew up with more affection and positive influences in his life than Mr. Jarvis alone could provide. Loki saw it as a privilege to help the boy become the best person he could. He had no doubt Anthony would grow to be an exceptional man.

In the meantime, being near his soul mate was a gift he had never expected to have again, and Loki knew their friendship did them both a world of good. Anthony was a joy and his presence should be seen as the gift it was instead of a burden. Loki did his best to undo the damage his father’s neglect had caused.

Thinking of Anthony pained him. Was Anthony aware of Loki’s absence? Did Anthony think he had abandoned him? Was he hurt? The questions running through his mind were driving him crazy; it was only the continued health and vibrancy of the soul bond that kept Loki from losing his mind for real this time. His visits with Anthony were his only contact with the outside world, his only chance to interact with another person, and Loki had not realized how much he’d come to depend on the dreams until they were gone. He could only pray it was temporary.

He recognized that the butler Mr. Jarvis did the best he could to protect Anthony, but he was in the end merely an employee of Howard Stark, and there was only so much he could do and still maintain his position within the household. Loki understood Jarvis had to walk a delicate line between Anthony and his employer. He would do Anthony no good at all if he were fired. Tony would be seven in just two more days and Loki was still hoping to see the boy for his birthday.

He hoped Anthony was old enough to answer some questions for him. Loki had known for a long time that he was not having normal dreams when he visited Anthony, and the boy was so smart and observant, Loki hoped that he’d be able to help Loki shed some light on the situation. So much was out of his control, and there was so much he didn’t know, but he suspected that his actions in the dreams might actually have some affect in real life. For he saw and heard many things that he simply could not have come up with on his own.

It could be that his and Anthony’s minds were connected and that the boy was providing details for their environment. However, Anthony never spoke of sleeping or dreams when they were together, he always acted as if he were wide awake and in the real world. Loki had not wanted to burden the young boy with things he was too young to understand, and so he’d bided his time.

He was almost certain that everything he dreamed actually happened, that he was seeing events as they occurred, and affecting the waking world, but he needed proof. If what he suspected was correct then perhaps he could find a way to use the magic that connected him and Anthony to break free of this terrible place. He’d once planned to get revenge but time with Anthony had shown him that killing his father, while satisfying, would not help matters. Signyn, Sherlock, and so many others, were dead but his love’s soul lived on, and so Loki must as well. Anthony was his first, his only priority.

He gave up on meditating. He knew he would find no respite for the moment. He stood up and walked over to one wall, ran his hand over it, and felt the magic running underneath his palms, so tantalizing yet inaccessible. He stood like that for some time, enjoying the brush of energy, even if he could make no use of it. He hoped to change that very soon. For some time he’d had a plan of escape forming in his mind. It was mad and the chances of success were low, but those kinds of plans were his specialty. He had escaped Asgard before and he was certain with enough power he could do it again.

However, he was unwilling to take the chance if there was any chance Anthony could be hurt. He also needed to make sure that even if he injured himself he would not die. Even a god could be killed and unlike his soul mate he did not think he’d be able to return. As things stood, he would not take the chance of leaving Anthony alone and vulnerable.

He was startled by the sound of the cell door opening behind him. He forced himself to stay calm; he could not show his father any vulnerability. _What is the old man doing here_ , he wondered? The little show he was forced to participate was still years away. Perhaps his father had grown bored and decided to taunt him in private, the better to rub more salt in his wounds.

“What do you want, old man? Humiliating me once a decade is no longer enough for you? As you can see I am still rotting away in your cage.” Loki sneered. He did not turn to face his father. It was a brazen show of disrespect but Loki did not care. His former father did not deserve his respect.

However when his visitor spoke, Loki realized it was not his father as he had assumed. Instead Loki heard a beloved voice speak his name, one he had not heard in nearly a hundred years.

He turned slowly, afraid he was wrong. He was afraid this was some cruel trick on his father’s part. He was sure he must be dreaming but there she was standing before him.

“Mother,” Loki whispered and he heard his voice break. Part of him was afraid it was a trick but then she spoke.

“Hello my darling boy,” Frigga said just as quietly, and she smiled at him tenderly. There were tears in her eyes. Loki relaxed for this was truly his mother. She’d called him by the nickname that only the two of them knew. She’d never called him that in front of his father because he never liked it when Frigga ‘coddled’ either of the boys.

Before he even knew what he was doing he had stepped forward and pulled his mother into a hug. He could smell her familiar perfume. The same one she’d worn all his life. It had been so long since he’d been hugged, and his mother’s arms still felt as safe and warm as they always had. He felt tears running down his cheeks and he knew his mother cried as well. They stood that way for some time before his mother finally stepped back. Loki let her go reluctantly, but he was unable to hold back his questions.

“Mother, what are you doing here? It’s been so long I had long given up hope that you’d visit me. Does father know you’re here with me?"

His mother smiled indulgently and gently pressed her palm against his cheek. “Some things never change. You were always so full of questions, my brave smart son. I’m sorry I could not speak with you before. I dared not anger your father. For everyone’s sake he must remain unaware of my sympathy and concern for Sigyn and yourself. Your father has no idea I am here and it must remain that way.”

Loki was surprised to hear this.

“Not that I’m not thrilled to see you, mother. You can’t imagine how happy I am to have you here. But he will know you came to see me.”

His mother gave him a mysterious and slightly smug smile. “Won’t he?” Loki asked. He was quite puzzled.

There was no need for guards because the cells were monitored most carefully. His mother was extremely powerful in her own right but nothing and no one on Asgard could hide from Odin’s sight, at least not for long. Asgard itself responded to Odin’s commands, and no one could override them.

His mother shook her head. “I am currently being hidden from his sight. He thinks I have gone shopping in Alfheim and will be gone for the entire day. You know your father - all I had to do was mention visiting the dressmaker and he wished me a safe trip, and left me as soon as it was polite to do so. Likely afraid I’d invite him to go with me. He does need some new shirts and the breast plate on his armor is looking a bit worn.”

Loki grinned. His father’s distaste for shopping and especially for allowing himself to be measured for new clothes was well known. His father felt it was a waste of his time and he avoided going shopping with Frigga at any cost.

“Not to mention he hates the Elves,” Loki added with another grin. His mother returned his smile with a mischievous one of her own. Loki felt his heart lighten as he looked at her. With his mother near he felt some of his burdens lift away.

“They are the only race in the Nine Realms who are more pretentious than he is. Father cannot abide being bested for any reason. Even at being the biggest aresehole there is.”

“Loki! Watch your language, young man. Have a care how you speak. Your father can be a trail at times but I still love him despite his mistakes. I know he has made many where you are concerned but I know he still loves you.”

Loki couldn’t help the disbelieving sound that escaped him but he remained silent. He would not contradict his mother. He knew she needed to believe that deep down inside his father was a good man. Loki would not take that from her.

“Despite his recent deplorable behavior he is still your father and your King.” His mother tried to look stern as she chided him but Loki wasn’t fooled. He could see the amusement sparkling in her eyes.

Their eyes met and suddenly they are both laughing. The laughter is a welcome release of the tension that Loki had been holding on to.

“My heart is truly lightened by your presence, mother,” he said earnestly.

His mother nodded. “I am happy as well.” Then she turned serious once again. “Your father must be made to see reason. I am going to make sure he does. I will see both my sons happy once more.”

Before Loki could reply his mother turned and took a seat on the hard cot, the only piece of furniture in the room. Loki followed and lowered himself to the seat beside her.

“I have much to tell you and very little time.” Loki’s heart sped up in excitement. Was his mother going to help him escape?

He waited with baited breath to hear what she had to say.

 

**Part 5**

Loki looked up at his mother expectantly, waiting for her to begin. He had so many questions but he knew his mother well enough to know that trying to rush her would get him nowhere. She would tell him what he needed to know in her own time.

His mother took a deep breath as if steadying herself. “I have been waiting for this moment for so long and now that the time has come I find myself strangely reluctant to begin.”

Loki was bewildered. What could have happened? What did his mother know? He was suddenly filled with a vague feeling of foreboding. He felt chilled to the bone and he shivered. He reached out and hugged his mother in an effort to comfort them both. His mother returned the hug, squeezing tightly.

Loki spoke, “Mother, I don’t understand. Are you here to tell me about the dreams? I know they are not the normal dreams people usually have. I suspect there is strong magic behind them. Are they your doing? If so I am most grateful-” Loki trailed off when his mother held up a hand to silence them.

Frigga released him and shook her head. “I have taught you all I know of magic, and powerful I may be, but even I am not strong enough to connect you and your soul mate in this way. There is another ancient and powerful Seidr at work here. I will tell you what I know and the truth of the dreams are part of it, but there are other things I must tell you first.”

Despite her words Loki could hear the reluctance in his mother’s voice, and he grew even more confused. What was going on? Frigga looked at Loki apprehensively, and he frowned in response.

“What could be so bad, mother, that you are afraid to speak to me of it? You know you can tell me anything,” he said in an attempt to reassure her.

If anything Frigga grew paler at his words. Now, Loki was sincerely alarmed.

Frigga reached out and took his hand. “After Sigyn was killed, you asked me if I knew why she was turned into a mortal and given the ability to reincarnate. Why I did not ensure she could find her eternal rest as I had done for so many others. It is true that her fate was completely out of my control, but I did not tell you all that I knew. I allowed her soul to be taken from me.”

Loki reared back as if slapped. His mother’s words sank in and searing pain took over, followed swiftly by a rising anger. Had she betrayed him?

“You assumed your father was somehow to blame and I admit I did nothing to correct your assumption because your belief in his guilt served the greater good. Or so I was told-”

“What do you mean? Told by whom?” he demanded. “You claimed you did not know why she and I must suffer through Sigyn’s many mortal lives. I believed you when you said you did not know why my soul mate and I are cursed by fate to lose one another over and over again, life after life!”

He stood up and began pacing in front of Frigga. “How could you lie to me? The one person whom I trusted to always tell me the truth.” A horrible thought occurred to him, it derailed his thoughts for a moment and then he turned to his mother shouting, “Tell me, do you know who killed her?” he demanded harshly. “Did you lie about knowing who took her from me?” His mother stared at him, too stricken with horror to speak, and Loki resisted the urge to shake the words out of her.

“I demand you answer the question, my queen,” Loki sneered, the words dripping with contempt. His mother flinched. “Do you know who killed my wife?” Loki gritted out through clenched teeth.

Frigga stood as well. Her voice had a desperate edge. “No, son, no! I swear I have no idea who killed her, I promise you. I would never have lied to you about that.  Think! You were there. you know by the time I came upon you both it was already too late.  Sigyn was too gravely wounded and there was nothing either of us could do. I am your mother and I would have done anything to spare you that pain if I could.”

“Spare me, spare me! Is that what you call it?” Loki cried. “I am doomed to lose her over and over again. The pain I have suffered is greater than any you can imagine.”

Loki was furious but still he felt tears filling his eyes. The magnitude of his mother’s betrayal was slowly beginning to sink in. It did not even cross his mind that Frigga was somehow responsible for Sigyn’s death. He had been with his mother shortly before he had found his wife. If not for this proof he might have been suspicious of her claims. The thought filled him with a terrible despair. He turned away from his mother and looked toward the wall of his cell. He fought to get himself under control.

Still facing away from his mother, he took several deep breaths; finally, his voice was even and as emotionless as he could make it when he spoke.

“I believe you.  Tell me, what role have you played in the farce my very existence has become, and speak quickly for I find I am very short on patience.”

Frigga gave a pained sigh and her voice shook when she spoke so much so that Loki was grateful he could not see her face. He was not ready to feel sympathy for her pain. She did not deserve it.

“When it became clear that nothing could be done for poor Sigyn.” Loki stiffened as he heard his mother speak his wife’s name. Frigga must have seen but she continued on. “I prepared to lead her to the gates of the afterlife, as was her right and my privilege. However, before I could follow through I was informed that Sigyn was not yet meant to find eternal rest.”

Loki was flabbergasted. His mother’s control over the souls of the dead was absolute. Who could challenge her beside his father? Who had the power to change her mind? This was why he had always assumed that Odin had led his mother astray to punish him. Before he could voice his question his mother continued.

"I was visited by The Three Norns themselves," his mother said baldly, as if she were speaking of an every day event.

Loki turned to her in shock, his mouth gaping. The Norns, how could this be? The three guardians of fate never interacted with any other beings. They never left their home in the Well of Urd. Carving the runes of fate into the base of Yggdrasil was far too important, lest the wheel of fate begin to unravel.

Frigga correctly read his expression and gave him a beseeching look. “I promise you, my son, I speak the truth. When they appeared before me I could hardly believe my eyes. They informed me that Sigyn’s death presented an opportunity to right a great wrong. They swore to me that it was the only way to prevent a catastrophe so massive that it would damage all the nine realms forever. Then they said that I must surrender both of you into their care. I allowed them to take Sigyn’s soul into their keeping.”

His mother looked at him pleadingly. “I swear to you I had no idea what they had planned. I had no idea the pain my actions would cause both of you. If I had I would have warned you in some way. The Norns assured me you would be reunited with your mate. I had no idea what would happen. They misled me most cruelly."

She paused but continued when Loki did not acknowledged her claim of ignorance.

"They ordered me to remain silent. They threatened to bind me if I refused. I did not have a choice but to agree. So I stayed quiet, all of these years. Not even your father knows. He was most angry to find he had no control over the situation. He let you believe he was responsible because he did not want to admit he did not know what was happening to you and why.”

Loki gave a short laugh at that bit of information. How typical.

The truth of her words finally hit him and Loki began to tremble.

Loki suddenly felt his legs begin to give out and he made his way unsteadily back to the cot sinking down without any of his usual grace. His mind was spinning; he did not know what to think. The Norns themselves were responsible for the hell he and his soul mate had been living in for thousands of years. Somehow their suffering was supposed to save the galaxy. How could he fight this? He’d never even had a chance, had he? He wanted to laugh and tell Frigga she was insane but as crazy as her story sounded he believed her. If the Norns themselves were involved, the situation must be dire indeed.  But what could he and his soul mate do? They were only two people: an imprisoned, powerless former God and a human. None of this made any sense.

Loki tried to focus. All these revelations were proving too much, but he had to know. “Can I assume they are behind the dreams as well?”

“Yes, the magic is theirs, but in this case, I asked them for their help. I could no longer stand by and watch you suffer in silence. “I wanted you to have some hope and contact with your soul mate even though you are imprisoned here. I wanted to spare you further pain.”

Loki felt himself softening a little. He was very grateful for her intervention but his pain was still too deep. His mother reached out to touch him and he flinched away.

“Don’t,” he said.

Frigga nodded, silently hurt by his rejection but accepting his wishes.

“They agreed to intervene on your behalf by connecting your dreams to your mate on Midgard. You affect his life but only in small and very subtle ways. The Norns also gave me the means to hide from your father so I could speak to you in peace. Your father might not be directly responsible but he still has much to answer for, and his actions have made a difficult situation far worse.”

Loki snorted. At least they could agree on something. No doubt the dreams served the Norns’ purpose somehow, but Loki needed them too much to be upset by the news. It was a small matter compared to the other things he had learned today.

“Why are you telling me this now? Why have they finally allowed me to know so much about my own life, when such great pains had been taken to hide the truth from me in the past?” Loki asked bitterly.

His mother smiled tremulously but it was also full of affection. “I know you, my son. You have some dangerous and mad plan forming in your mind. You plan to escape.”

It was not a question. Loki sighed but did not return her smile. His mother knew him well. He nodded curtly in reply.

“I ask you to be patient and continue as you have been. The guardians agreed I should be allowed to intercede before you continued along your path. I promise you have not been abandoned. Injuring or killing yourself in a foolish stunt will help no one. I promise you will be reunited with your mate someday soon. I know I have given you little cause to trust me this day but please do as I have asked. If not for your own sake then for that of young Anthony.”

Loki was not surprised his mother was familiar with his soul mate’s current life. Heimdall was very wise. He saw all on Midgard and kept his queen well informed, despite his King’s express wishes.

“Anything else?” he asked his mother dully. He had had enough.

She shook her head sadly. “That is all I know. I swear it.”

Loki nodded. “Thank you for telling me. I do appreciate the consideration,” he spoke with icy politeness. Part of him knew his mother meant well but he could not forgive her, not yet. Perhaps not ever.  Her actions were too little too late as far as Loki was concerned.

“Leave me. I must think, and I cannot stand to have you within my sight.”

His mother gasped in pain but she nodded and with one finally longing look, she turned and left the room without another word. The door locked behind her, only a slight click yet Loki felt it echo through the room, mocking him.

Loki was left alone, as always. He was shocked and overwhelmed and his thoughts were scattered. They whirled with all the information he had learned. After a long while he lay down. _Oh Signyn,_ he thought desperately. _What do I do? What’s going to happen to us? How can I keep us safe when we are truly at the mercy of the mistresses of fate themselves?_

Silence was his only answer. Loki had never felt so dreadfully alone. His heart ached, each beat felt painful. Finally, utterly exhausted, he slept but still he did not dream.

 

**Part 6**

May 1980

Tony had been having the best day! It was his tenth birthday and he had been in the middle of his best birthday party ever, in the history of birthday parties. The party had a Star Wars theme because it was Tony’s favorite movie.  There were spaceship models scattered around. His father had hired people to pretend to be Chewie and R2D2 and C3PO. There was even a cake with all the characters on it - it was so awesome!

His father had even arranged for Luke Skywalker and Han Solo to come for a visit. Tony knew they were just actors but it had still been really awesome. They’d answered all of Tony’s questions and signed all of his action figures. They’d even taken a picture with him.

The best part was that his father had arranged for a private screening of _The Empire Strikes Back._ Tony had been beside himself with joy ever since he found out. He had workers set up a movie theatre inside the house and everything.

There was even soda and fresh buttery popcorn because everyone knew you couldn’t have a movie without popcorn. It was a rule. The movie hadn’t even been released yet so it had come with lots of security to keep it safe and everyone at the party had to show identification to get in. Tony couldn’t wait to see it.

It was the best day ever, or it would be except for two things. First, Tony wished John were there. He had been hoping to see his friend for his birthday but so far John hadn’t made an appearance. John had explained that he didn’t control when he came to visit him so if he had to stay away it wasn’t by choice.

John was often quiet when he came to visit, and he often watched Tony with a sad look in his eyes when he thought Tony couldn’t see. Tony didn’t understand what had changed, but when he asked John just smiled and said Tony needed to be older to understand, and then he’d change the subject. It was very frustrating and Tony was trying to find a way to convince John to tell him more. So far it wasn’t working. None of his tricks worked on John.

The other problem ruining his birthday was that there were lots of kids running around. Howard Stark had invited the children of every important person he knew as well as several boys from a nearby prep school. No doubt so he could impress their rich and influential parents. Tony didn’t really like any of them. Tony had been excited at first. He thought meeting other kids would be fun but he had been proven very wrong. They were all mean or stuck up or both. Tony hadn’t had much experience with other children and if this was what they were all like he hadn’t missed much.

Right now, he was hiding from some of the older boys who had taken control of the party. The oldest was named Paul and he was the worst. Tony had seen him picking on the younger boys and when Tony had told him to stop, he’d called Tony a freak because he was so smart. The others had all laughed at him including the boy he’d been defending, and not knowing what else to do Tony had run away. The boys had laughed more and they’d called Tony a chicken and a baby. It had made Tony so angry. It was so unfair. After all, Tony wasn’t a baby. He was ten years old!

This was all his parent’s fault. He didn’t see any reason why he had to go to school, at all. He didn’t think he needed to learn better socialization skills. Whatever that meant. He was quickly learning most people weren’t worth getting to know. He’d rather stay here with his parents, Jarvis and John until he went away to college.

Tony already knew he wanted to go to The Massachusetts Institute of Technology. They had the best robotics and engineering programs. Tony was really looking forward to college and learning all kinds of new things. There might even be other people he could talk to, and who would understand him there. The fact that everyone would be so much older didn’t worry him at all. He got along much better with grownups anyway.

Tony sighed both sad and kind of confused. He had never felt this strange or this lonely before. He never realized some people would consider being smart to be a bad thing. Other children were weird. Jarvis, John and even his mom occasionally said Tony was special. His intelligence was the one thing his father liked about him as long as Tony remembered not to overdo it and outshine his dad. Yet these boys hated him for it. It didn’t make any sense. He wished again his friend was here with him. If John were there to share the day with him, maybe the boys wouldn’t have had the chance to be so nasty to him, or at least Tony wouldn’t have cared

As if in response to his wish, he felt the familiar tingling in his chest and looked around eagerly for John. He wasn’t really surprised; John had a habit of appearing when Tony needed him most. He was an awesome best friend that way. Tony was excited he had come after all! Maybe he could stay for the movie.

John appeared before him solid and real and Tony felt tears come to his eyes. Without thinking he threw himself into John’s arms. John reached out and caught him but Tony also felt him stiffen in surprise at his unexpected welcome. “Well now, what’s this?” Tony blushed, embarrassed. He had declared himself too old for hugs recently, and John had respected his choice with a grave nod. Although there had been an amused twinkle in his eyes.

“Anthony, what is wrong?” John asked alarmed. He looked around the small room where Tony had retreated to hide and start planning his revenge on those other boys. They would be sorry they’d messed with him!

“Where are we? I’ve never been in this room before.”

“My father’s private library. I’m not allowed in here,” Tony admitted, “but I needed to hide somewhere no one would find me.”

“Why are you hiding?” John asked gently.

“My dad invited a whole bunch of boys I don’t even know over for my birthday and they were being mean to me,” Tony said

John raised an eyebrow. “They were being mean to you,” he repeated, his voice strangely flat. “In what way?”

“They made fun of me because I didn’t know how to play football. Paul Anderson, he’s the worst one, he said I’m a stupid freak and that I think I’m better than everyone else because I’m so smart. But it’s not true! He was just being mean for no reason! Then everyone else laughed and I ran away.” Tony looked down at his hands, slightly embarrassed by his actions.

John understood how he was feeling. “It’s alright, Anthony; you did the right thing removing yourself from the situation. I speak from personal experience when I tell you that bullies cannot be reasoned with.”

Tony’s mouth fell open in surprise. “Someone used to bully you? Who would do that to you?” he asked incredulously.

John smiled ruefully “Growing up, my brother and his friends were all bigger than me, they would often tease me and play pranks. If I complained to our parents my brother would claim it was all in good fun. My father often took his side, and on the few occasions he was punished, afterwards, he always made sure I suffered for getting him into trouble.”

Tony couldn’t believe it. “But you’re so big and strong,” he said. He hoped some day he was as tall as John.

John laughed but it wasn’t a pleasant sound. He did however manage a small smile. “I know I seem tall now but I was always small for my age.”

“Smaller than me?” Tony asked. He couldn’t imagine John as a boy.

John paused, thinking it over, and finally he nodded. “Yes, I think so actually. You are already taller than me at your age. I bet one day you’ll tower over me.” Tony imagined himself towering over a very tiny John. He giggled in delight at the idea.

John smiled and affectionately ruffled his hair. As always Tony glared at him, but he didn’t mind so much anymore. Not that he would tell John that.

“Feeling better?” John asked.

Tony shrugged, “A little.” He remembered what the boys had called him. “You really don’t think I’m a chicken for running away?” he asked tentatively.

John shook his head. “No, I don’t,” he said firmly. “It was merely a strategic retreat.”

A Strategic retreat. Tony liked that. “I am very smart,” he said and grinned at John.

“That you are,” John agreed.

“Still I kind of wish I’d punched Paul,” he said wistfully. “He was the biggest and meanest,” he added.

John laughed again and this time it was a happier sound.

“Oh Anthony. It might have been satisfying, I can’t deny that, but I want you to remember violence should never be your first response in a situation, unless your life is in mortal danger and you have no choice. Still, you’re getting old enough now that maybe you could learn some self-defense of some kind. It would be good for you. You can ask your parents,” John suggested. It sounded casual but there was a strangely intense look in his eyes.

Tony sensed it was important so he nodded his agreement readily enough. Learning to fight sounded like fun!

“I will,” he promised, more cheerful now that his worries had been eased.

“Good, you need to be able to take care of yourself. It’s important.”

John said he was still staring at Tony intently but he asked lightly, “So why are these boys visiting you?”

“They’re here for my birthday party, but I didn’t want them here. My mom and dad invited them. Dad has been talking about sending me to school.” Tony made a face. He didn’t want to go to school with those jerks. “He says I have to get ready to go to MIT in a few years, that I need to learn to get along with other kids. I think he just wants to use me to impress the other parents. I asked if I could keep working with my tutor but Dad said it was either Anderson Prep or boarding school.”

Surprisingly his mother had argued against the boarding school. He had heard his parents arguing about it one night. She tended to ignore Tony now that he was getting older, but she’d heard his father threatening him and had gotten angry. Much to everyone’s surprise.

It was his mother’s idea for him to go to one of the excellent day schools in the area. His father had tried to insist on boarding school. Generations of Stark men had gone away to school, but for once his mother had put her foot down. She had looked more animated than Tony had ever seen her. He was grateful for her interference, but he wasn’t happy. Tony knew he should have already been in school but his father had thrown money around and pulled some strings to allow Tony to be tutored at home. He wanted to stay at home; he was already several grades above his fellow students anyway.

John’s face twisted with anger but he merely sighed heavily. “Maybe it won’t be so bad,” he offered quietly. “All the boys can’t be jerks. I’m sure you’ll make some friends. Having friends your own age would be good for you, Anthony.”

Tony scoffed. “I don’t need friends my own age. I have you and Jarvis. I don’t need anyone else,” Tony said firmly.

“I hate to do this now but I don’t know when I’ll have another chance.” John looked very uncertain and very serious and Tony was abruptly a little scared.

“What’s wrong,” he asked John.

“You know that my visits have become rarer and shorter over the years, and you remember when I explained I don’t have control over when I visit or for how long.”

Tony nodded in understanding.

John hesitated looking very serious. “Visiting you takes a lot of… special energy. I was given it because I don’t have access to my own. Sort of like a – a loan, but it’s getting harder for me to stay, and I’ve been more tired after my visits. I think the energy required to bring me here might be beginning to lessen. I’m afraid it might disappear altogether some day.”

Tony’s heart sped up as the meaning of John’s words hit home. “You mean you won’t be able to visit me anymore?”

“I’m afraid so,” John admitted and he looked very sad.

“No!” Tony shouted desperately. He felt tears fill his eyes and he blinked them away. “You can’t go! I need you.”

“I don’t want to," John said. "I promise you that as long as it’s within my power I will be here for you. But some things are out of our control."

Tony wasn’t ready to give up. “No. I won’t let you. What kind of energy do you need? I can help you find some more. Or my dad can. I know he’s mean but he likes discovering new things. I bet if we tell him about the special energy he’ll help.”

“No!” John shouted and Tony reared back in surprise. John never yelled at him.

John looked instantly contrite. “I’m sorry but we can’t tell him. No one can know I’m here, remember. It’s our secret.”

“But why? We have to do something.”

John shook his head. “I’m not sure. I just know it’s important. I feel it here,” he said, touching the area over his heart.

“I don’t care,” Tony said stubbornly.

John looked at him helplessly. “I’m sorry, little one. It is the way it has to be.” John hadn’t called him that in a long time.

Tony started to cry. “Please don’t leave me,” he said.

John reached out and pulled him into a hug. Tony resisted for a moment but then gave in and returned the hug.

“If I had a choice I’d never leave,” he promised. Tony realized John was crying too.

“Isn’t there anything you can do?”

John shook his head. “We could be worrying over nothing. I might be able to visit for many more years. I just want you to be prepared in case I don’t come back one day,” he said. His voice broke a little.

Tony still refused to give up. Stark’s always got what they wanted because they never gave up. His father always said so. Tony could be very persistent.

“You said someone gave you the energy. Can’t they just give you more?

“I’m not sure,” John admitted.

“Can you ask them?” Tony insisted

John hesitated for a few minutes, thinking it over. “Maybe I could. I have tried to talk to them before. They never listen to me.”

Tony’s mind raced over the problem looking for a solution. Then Tony had a great idea.

“Take me with you and I’ll talk to them. My mom says I’m really charming. I bet I can convince them to give you more energy and maybe if I talk to them you can stay here forever!”

John smiled sadly. “I have no doubt you could, but I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way.”

Tony opened his mouth to argue but John shook his head. “Enough about this now. Perhaps I shouldn’t have told you.

“No,” Tony said firmly. “I’m glad you did. I can handle it. I’m not a baby anymore.”

John nodded seriously. “Very well.  I’m proud of you for being so mature. Do you want to go back to your party?”

Tony remembered the movie but he wasn’t really excited anymore. He also didn’t want to go back out and face all those people and he knew his parents would be angry with him for disappearing. He knew John wouldn’t come so he didn’t bother to ask. He hadn’t given up though. He didn’t want to lose John, but he allowed John to distract him for now.

“I want to stay here with you,” he said.

“All right,” John agreed. “I should make you go back but I won’t. We both earned a break I think. Here let’s sit.” He led Tony to the big comfortable couch.

“Will you read to me?” Tony asked quietly. He always liked it when John read to him. He always did all the voices.

“Of course,” John said, and Tony got up and picked out a book, returning to the couch as quickly as he could. He didn’t know how much time they had. Tony felt the sadness creeping in but he pushed it away.

John read the title and he got a funny look on his face that Tony couldn’t read. Then John’s expression cleared and he smiled, “The Count of Monte Cristo. Excellent choice,” he praised. _How ironic,_ Tony heard John mutter under his breath.

Tony decided not to ask, but it only made him more determined to find a way to help John. He had known for a long time that something strange was going on. He’d been content to wait until he was older, like John said, but no longer. He would figure out the truth. He just had to think it over. He already knew they were connected in some way. Maybe he could follow John to where he lived. He had to find a way to talk to whomever could help them, convince them it was the right thing to do. He promised himself no matter what it took he would solve the mystery of John. John was his best friend and no one was going to take him away. Tony would not allow it. If he needed to he would ask Jarvis to help him. He wanted his friends to meet. He knew they’d get along!

John’s voice broke into his thoughts, “Happy Birthday, Anthony. I’m glad I didn’t miss it this year.” Tony grinned his thanks.

John began to read. His familiar voice was comforting and soothing and Tony began to relax.

Despite his best efforts, Tony soon fell asleep curled up next to John. When Jarvis finally found him, he scolded Tony soundly for missing his party and worrying everyone. Tony didn’t care though, he was too sad because John was gone.

 

**Part 7**

December 1981

Tony struggled for every breath. Each one felt like jagged knives were being pushed into his chest. He felt as though he’d been sick forever. He was so cold. The smell of antiseptic and other nasty hospital smells hung in the air. The sheets were scratchy against his skin. Usually Tony hated hospitals but right know he was too focused on breathing to notice. Tony tried to think but his head felt like it was stuffed with cotton. It was scary to struggle so much with his thoughts. Usually he couldn’t stop thinking but know his thoughts felt as slow as molasses. His throat felt scratchy and raw. He was so thirsty. He wanted to ask for water but he couldn’t get enough air into his lungs to speak. Tony lay in the bed too tired to move. He heard someone calling his name. The voice seemed to be coming from far way but it called to him insistently.

The voice was familiar and comforting. The voice made Tony feel safe, but Tony could hear the fear in it. What was the voice afraid of? Tony didn’t understand. The voice was important but he couldn’t remember who it belonged to.  He tried to answer, to reassure the voice he was okay, but he felt his awareness begin to slip away. The last thing he felt was a hand resting gently on his forehead before Tony allowed unconsciousness to claim him with a relieved sigh.

****

Loki frantically looked over Tony’s medical chart, and at the machines that were keeping track of his vitals. He had never seen these types of machines before but the technology was nothing compared to Asgard’s and quite easy for him to figure out. What had happened? The last time he’d seen Anthony, the boy had been ill with what he thought was a cold. He had a slight fever and a cough but Loki had been reassured that the illness was mild. Or so he had thought. Clearly something had gone terribly wrong. Tony had pneumonia, a complication that had arisen from influenza. His heart sped up as fear raced through his veins.

In his time on Midgard Loki had seen influenza kill thousands of people, but surely the humans had advanced enough that something could be done to keep Anthony alive? He knew Howard Stark only hired the best people and there was no doubt that this was a top of the line medical facility. Loki tried to reassure himself, but a treacherous voice pointed out the numbers weren’t looking good, and Anthony’s fever was extremely high. The boy’s skin was waxy and pale. He watched anxiously as Tony struggled for every breath he took. The doctor in Loki recognized that Anthony’s situation was quite serious.

Instinctively he reached for his magic to try to aid him but what little magic he could access fizzled out. Apparently he wasn’t allowed to access his magic despite the dire situation. He suspected that if The Norns had wanted he would be able to. They were extremely powerful after all, and the reality was very little was known about the true extent of their power. He swore in frustration.

“This isn’t fair,” he said out loud. “Why won’t you let me help him now? I’ve been able to influence things before. Isn’t that why you let me visit him? Is this part of your grand plan?” He couldn't keep the sarcasm out of his voice. As always he received no answer.

He did not know if the Norns could hear him. He had picked up the habit of addressing the occasional comment or insult to them. It made him feel better and some small part of him had hoped he could goad them into speaking with him. Particularly when he’d realized the magic that connected him to Anthony was beginning to fade.

He’d screamed in rage, calling for them for three straight days uncaring of who else might hear him in his distress, but the bitches had ignored him. His visits to Anthony had grown rarer as he’d thought, although they had not stopped all together. At least, not yet.

He found a chair and sat down to keep a careful watch over Anthony. The world outside the window was dark and it fit Loki’s mood. He spared a moment to wonder why the boy was all alone when he was so very ill, but he wasn’t going to question his good fortune. He did not know how he would explain his presence here if someone walked in, but he also couldn’t bring himself to care. He would do anything to stay by Anthony’s side in his time of need. He would simply have to lie, but he was quite the accomplished liar when he wanted to be. Loki was sure he could still live up to the name of Silver Tongue with ease.

He settled in to watch and wait. He did not know how long he would be allowed to stay this time. Antony looked so small and fragile in the hospital bed. As he watched over him, Loki had never felt so helpless or so afraid. Not since that day he’d held a dying Sherlock in his arms, and desperate to save him, Loki had embarked on a foolish path that had led to his imprisonment at Odin’s hands.

He sat for a while simply watching Anthony breathe and keeping a careful eye on his vitals. All the while he talked to Anthony, telling him some of the more pleasant stories from his childhood, and he pulled up long forgotten stories that both his parents used to tell Thor and him as children.

A nurse entered the room. She was blonde and very pretty. She looked at him curiously as she entered but did not seem alarmed to see him sitting there as Loki had expected. After checking over Anthony’s vitals and taking his blood pressure, she turned to Loki with a friendly smile.

"Hello, I’m Kelly, Tony’s nurse for the night. You must be the new bodyguard. Mr. Jarvis let us know you’d be coming. I take it he finally went home to get some rest. I’m sorry but I wasn’t given your name."

Loki smiled. How fortunate. “Yes, I am. Mr. Stark only just hired me. It’s a pleasure to meet you. My name is John Watson.” The nurse shook his hand and then excused herself.

Stupid woman, trusting him so easily was very foolish. What if meant Anthony harm? She had left the path wide open for him. He was glad Mr. Jarvis had hired someone to look after the boy in his no doubt infrequent but necessary absences. It was good to know Anthony’s other protector was nearby.

Loki wondered where Maria and Howard Stark were. They should be at their son’s bedside. Loki did not believe they would be so callous as not to care their son was sick in the hospital. No matter how drunk or self-centered they might be.

If Loki found out otherwise, he'd take great pleasure in flaying the flesh from their bones.

However, he did have a problem. Mr. Jarvis was most likely still lurking around somewhere, as was the bodyguard. This was not good. Mr. Jarvis would most certainty raise an alarm at his presence. Before Loki could begin to formulate a plan, he heard Anthony gasp in a harsh breath and then all the machines began to make horrible wailing noises, alarms going off. It took another moment for Loki to realize the horrible truth - Anthony had stopped breathing. He was dying. Loki screamed for the nurses as doctors and nurses ran into the room, lugging various medical instruments behind them. The doctors moved at a frantic pace to save their young patient.

One of the doctors pushed Loki out of the way, and Loki followed his direction without really understanding what the man was saying to him. He only wanted his mate to be safe once more. His gaze was locked on Anthony. He looked even paler than he had before, and his lips were beginning to turn blue. Loki wanted desperately to help, however, all he could do was watch silently, frozen in terror as a helpless rage filled his heart.

 

**Part 8**

The frantic activity continued around him, while Loki could do nothing but watch. He did his best to control the rage and despair that threatened to consume him. He would do Anthony no good if he panicked. He needed a plan. He reached for the bond. As long as the bond was healthy there was still hope. What he found, however, filled him with dismay.

Loki abruptly became aware that the soul bond was weakening. The feeling and warmth of connection that was always with him while his soul mate lived was fading. The realization knocked him out of his terrified stupor.  Anthony’s soul was getting ready to leave his body. Adrenaline rushed through Loki. He could not allow his soul mate to die, not at such a young age. Anthony Stark had a brilliant mind and he was destined to change the world.  From the moment they’d met Loki had known that this would be no ordinary lifetime for his mate. He had to survive. There was no other option as far as Loki was concerned.

As long as they were still connected Loki had a chance to save him, but what could he do when he was almost powerless. A desperate plan began to form. He could not access magic in the normal way, it was true. However, every magical being had a small amount if innate magic held in reserve because the body needed that magic to function properly. It was as vital to a magical person’s wellbeing as food or water. If his plan succeeded it could very well kill him, but he suspected it would not come to that. He could only pray his suspicions were correct. He did not intend to leave his soul mate alone. His plan was incredibly risky but if successful the reward would be well worth it. Did he dare? If Anthony died, he would return again. Loki had only to wait. He knew his mate would not want Loki to suffer on his behalf.

He looked at Anthony’s ashen face and knew he didn’t have much time. He knew he could not let his love die so young. Tony deserved to have a long and happy life. He knew in his heart the choice had already been made. He would gladly give up his life for that of his mate. “Let’s see how important we really are to you,” he murmured in the direction of the ceiling. If he was wrong, they would both suffer immeasurably, but it was a chance he had to take.

He closed his eyes and forced himself to relax. He had never tried to do this within the dream environment the Norms had given him, but he had nothing to lose. He pictured the bond that connected their souls. The once vibrant threads were dull and he could see the places where the bond was beginning to weaken.  He knew he could not draw any magic from his surroundings, instead he gathered the small amount of internal magic he still had within him and pushed it towards Anthony’s half of the bond. It took all the strength he had left to use his magic to strengthen the bond. As his magic was absorbed, Loki felt intense pain begin to overtake him. His body no longer had enough magic to function properly. His muscles began to cramp and he felt his heart begin to slow. Instinctively his body tried in vain to pull more magic in, but all it did was tire Loki out even more.

He was vaguely aware his leg had given out under the strain, but he did not allow his focus to break. He continued to funnel all the magic he could into the bond, strengthening it with his own magic until Anthony’s soul thread was once again robust and vibrant, even as his own began to fade from his sight. Once he was sure Anthony’s soul was once again secure, he released the bond and slowly opened his eyes. He was unsurprised to find he was lying on the floor. He was gasping for breath and his entire body was slick with sweat. He could feel his heart stuttering inside his chest. He knew without help he would not survive for long. He was aware of a doctor at his side, checking him over. “Anthony,” he asked. His voice was weak and raspy. He tried to sit up but he was too weak.

A hand pushed him down gently. “Whoa, lie still,” the doctor ordered. “The boy is going to be fine. We were able to get his heart beating again. Right now I’m worried about you. You just collapsed. Are you experiencing any chest pain, sir?” Loki smiled in satisfaction. Anthony was alive; he didn’t bother to answer the doctor. There was nothing the man could do for him. _Come on, come on,_ he thought. _What will you do if I die before I fulfill my great destiny._

He felt himself being lifted off the floor and onto a gurney. The doctor was calling out orders. Loki began losing track of what was happening around him. The world began to fade away, breathing was getting more difficult, and he was growing cold. They were cutting it very close. Perhaps they didn’t need him after all.

Just as he decided the second half of his gamble would be his ultimate undoing, he felt a rush of magic flowing into him. He felt the life returning to his body. _Got you_ , he thought smugly. He was incredibly grateful to have been correct in his assumptions.

His body drank the magic up as quickly as it could. He glutted himself on it for several minutes before the magic slowly tapered off. Loki reveled in the feeling of completeness. The magic sang in his veins. His own internal magic began to recover, although he knew it would take a while to return to normal. Then he checked the bond, finding it healthy and strong once again. He had more power than he’d had in a long time. He sighed in relief. The Norns hadn’t let him die. He felt his strength returning to him, and opened his eyes to sit up. He wasn’t all that surprised to see that everyone in the room appeared to be frozen in place. Someone had stopped time. It was a very impressive piece of magic.

He turned toward the doorway and was somewhat surprised to see just one woman standing before him and not all three as he had expected. He’d thought the Norns always traveled together. Loki mentally shrugged. Surely this one would be able to answer his questions. He would not allow himself to be treated as little more than a puppet any longer. He was done being the plaything of the mistresses of fate. He studied the woman in front of him. She was very beautiful.  Her long blonde hair flowed down her back and her skin seemed to glow even in the harsh fluorescent lights. She looked young and innocent but Loki knew he needed to be careful. The old adage that appearances could be deceiving had never been truer than at this moment.

Still, it wouldn’t hurt to show respect. This was an extremely powerful and unpredictable being after all.

He bowed deeply. “My Lady,” he said. “You honor me with your presence.” He tried to sound as sincere as he possibly could. He could not afford to completely alienate the Norn.

She smiled congenially at him. “Well met, son of Odin. Although I do wish it could have been under better circumstances than these.”

Loki smiled in return. It was good to know he hadn’t lost his touch.

His self-congratulation was short lived however when the Guardian raised one eyebrow and said, “You have made quite the spectacle of yourself, haven’t you Loki Odinson. You certainly have quite the flair for the dramatic,” she asked dryly.  “You have dared to challenge us in a way that no one ever has. You have made my sisters very angry but I admit I find myself somewhat amused by your antics.”

Loki’s respect for this woman rose considerably. She was clearly no fool. Loki had an appreciation for clever beings no matter their form.

However, he couldn’t deny his wrath at having his actions dismissed so cavalierly. Antics indeed. How dare she? Rather than lash out, however, he tried desperately to remain civil.

“My Lady, surely you understand I could not allow my soul mate’s life to be cut so short. It has always been my duty to protect my soul mate. I could not allow Anthony to die this night. I fulfilled my duty to the best of my ability just as you do yours.”

The lady frowned at him. “Let us be frank with one another. It would have been easier to let him die. His soul will be reincarnated but yours will not. You knew that if you endangered your life we would be forced to intervene to protect you, did you not?”

Loki returned her honesty in kind. “I was not sure but I suspected. My mother hinted that Sigyn and I are caught up in some larger scheme of your making. What gives you the right to interfere in our lives?”

She was growing angry. “You are like an impudent child. If we had not interfered your mate would have moved on to the afterlife after her first death. You would have to spend many thousands of years without her. Is this not better?

Loki snorted in disbelief. “Surely you jest, Lady,” he said. “If Sigyn had been allowed to enter the afterlife as is her right, I would know she was at peace and that I would join her someday, for even Asgardians don’t live forever. Instead she has been forced to suffer over dozens of lifetimes and I have suffered with her every step of the way. I felt the agony of her loss a thousand times over, and yet you try to pretend you did us some sort of favor. I do not believe you. You are simply using us for your own ends. Tell me, how do I know you did not kill my wife to begin with?”

The lady’s eyes flashed and Loki felt a blast of power hit him. He took an involuntary step back. “How dare you! I am one of the protectors of the fate of all the beings in this galaxy. We do not take a life unless it has come to its fated end. Your Sigyn should have lived many more years by your side.”

Loki opened his mouth to speak. But the lady raised her hand before he could. “Be silent!” she commanded. “I will explain matters and you will be given a choice, something you have been denied for far too long. After you know the truth you will decide whether to continue on your current course or take your mate and flee the fate of this universe.”

Loki was skeptical. “If I decide to leave you will let us go just like that.”

The Lady nodded. “I understand why you do not believe me, but that you must be given a choice. We can manipulate you no further in this. The time to act is almost upon us.”

“I will listen,” Loki agreed. He privately thought he knew what his choice would be.

Then the lady spoke and Loki’s world tilted on its axis. “There is another dark power at work here. My sisters and I know not what it is. It is adversely affecting the fate of all in this realm, twisting it beyond recognition. It is an abomination! We have acted as best as we can to curtail the damage.”

Loki felt true terror pierce his heart. Someone or something as strong as The Norns themselves was changing fate. He could hardly believe what he was hearing.

“But I thought each of us have a certain power over our own fate?” He knew fate was not set in stone like some humans believed. Instead it was quite fluid. Actions were like ripples in a pond - one person had the power to change the fate of many others.

The Lady nodded in solemn acknowledgement of his words. “This is true, but from time to time one is born with the power to change the fate of the entire universe in both big and small ways. Normally my sisters and I would not interfere in these matters. It is not our place. However, we sense that there is something unnatural about the changes that are currently taking place.  There is too much darkness and pain in the world; it has damaged Yggdrasil itself. The roots of the tree have begun to rot. The universe is out of balance and it must be restored before all is lost.”

Loki froze in horror. This could not be true.  If Yggdrasil died all the Nine Realms would die with it. Billions of lives would be extinguished. It would be a catastrophe of unimaginable proportions.

“I see from your face you understand the seriousness of my words,” the lady continued. “We searched long for another who had the power to change fate on a large scale, one who is capable of restoring the balance. As she lay dying our attention was drawn to your mate, and we realized that she too could have that power under the right conditions.”

Loki gasped in shock. Sigyn had the power to change the fate of the entire universe? Is this why they had been set on this terrible path, so that the conditions would be met? The idea only made his anger grow, but then he was derailed as a terrible thought occurred to him.

“Is this why she was killed,” he asked quietly. He felt his anger draining away in the face of the magnitude of what he and his mate were being asked to do. He finally understood. While he still carried a great deal of resentment, he understood that The Norns were doing what they thought was right. After all, what were the lives of two people compared to those of billions?

The Lady nodded and looked at him steadily, her beautiful face full of sympathy.  “You finally begin to understand the magnitude of your mate’s role. We rescued her and made her mortal. We allowed her to live her many lives learning and changing all the while. All this was done in preparation for the time when she would be needed.”

“Lady, I see now why you saved my wife, but why allow me to spend so many lives by her side only to lose her? Why not spare us both this pain?”

She looked at him almost tenderly, her expression that of a mother gazing on a favorite child. “Loki,” she said gently. “You are the other half of her soul. Your presence gives her strength. She is not the only one who has benefitted from our actions. You have both suffered greatly, I do not deny this. However you cannot deny that over the years you have learned much. I am proud of how much you’ve grown and changed for the better. Together the two of you will be a powerful force for good. Together you will not fail. I have faith you will heal the realms of their current affliction.”

She looked over at Anthony who looked far healthier than he had before. A large part of him desperately wanted to refuse. He longed to pick the child up and run away. He had enough magic now he could break free from his prison. He could take Anthony to a different galaxy until this one had met its unfortunate end. Why were so many strangers their responsibility? Loki had not asked to be a hero. He was so tempted to do just that, but he knew his mate would never forgive him. His soul mate was one of the most generous and caring people he knew. No matter the lifetime his soul mate would insist upon fighting for the greater good.

“We have lingered too long. You must choose,” the Lady said.

“I choose to continue on the path you have laid out for me. My mate and I will try to heal our universe before it is destroyed. I only ask one thing of you.”

She looked at him and with a nod encouraged him to continue.

“I ask that no matter what happens you do all you can to protect my soul mate. I don’t care what happens to me but I want my mate to be safe.”

The Lady nodded. “I am pleased our faith in you was not misplaced, Loki Odinson. You have my word, it will be done. Although you did not ask, I promise your father will suffer for his crimes against you.” He felt the magic of her vow settle over them and he jerked in surprise. He hadn’t expected her to reinforce her promise with magic but he felt surprisingly reassured.

Loki nodded in acknowledgement of her promise. He felt some satisfaction his father would someday pay for his crimes but it was overshadowed by his relief in knowing that Anthony would be safe. It was the one thing Loki cared about most.  He looked over at Anthony again.  “I won’t be allowed to visit him again, will I?” he asked, resigned.

The Lady once again looked sympathetic to his plight, but nevertheless her words broke his heart. “I’m sorry but no, there are certain things Anthony Stark must be allowed to face on his own. He must be allowed to grow the rest of the way into adulthood without interference. Like you he must be given the freedom to choose his own path. You may say good bye.”

Anthony was still sleeping. “May I speak to him one last time?” He wanted to at least say goodbye.

The lady nodded and Loki saw Anthony’s eyes flutter open. He smiled when he saw John. “John,” he whispered “What’s going on?”

“Shh, everything is fine. You’ve been very ill but you’re going to be fine. I promise.” Despite his best effort, his voice broke.

Anthony smiled. “I do feel better,” he said. He looked closely at John. “What’s wrong? Why do you look so sad?”  he asked in alarm.

“Relax. You’ve been through a lot. You shouldn’t get upset. You need to heal. I’m sad I have to go now, little one,” he said

Anthony shook his head in denial. He grabbed Loki’s hand. “No, I haven’t seen you in a long time. Why can’t you stay for a while?”

Loki felt tears fill his eyes. “I just can’t, Anthony. You know I can’t control it.”

Anthony still looked displeased but he nodded. “I hope you come back soon,” he said quietly. He looked at Loki with so much trust in his eyes, Loki felt like the worst blackguard in the universe. Many years ago, he had sworn never to break Sigyn’s trust again. He should have known it was a promise he would not be able to keep.

Loki hesitated, debating whether to tell Anthony the whole truth. But the lady caught his eye and shook her head. He wanted to ignore her but he had promised to follow her lead, and he did want to spare Anthony as much pain as he could.

“Me too. Go to sleep now, you need your rest.” He leaned over and kissed Anthony on the forehead. “Goodbye, little one, I love you. You are the best most important person in my life, and my dearest friend. Never forget that.” He felt tears running down his cheek. He didn’t bother to wipe them away.

“Why are you crying?” Anthony demanded. He grew alarmed once again, and Loki cursed his lack of control. He tried to rein in his emotions.

“I’m just so happy you’re alright. I was very worried. These are happy tears I, promise.” Anthony narrowed his eyes. He knew Loki too well. He was too smart for his own good. Anthony sighed as his tiredness took over. He relaxed against the sheets but his look promised an interrogation as soon as he could manage it. Loki smiled despite his inner turmoil. His mate could always see right through him.

He could tell Anthony was trying to stay awake, but it was a battle he quickly lost. Loki suspected the Lady had helped him on his way. He was grateful for her assistance; he didn’t have the strength for a long goodbye. He was afraid if he lingered he would change his mind, and try to run. Promises and consequences be damned.

He squeezed Anthony’s hand before letting go. “I’ll see you again someday. We will be reunited, I promise,” he whispered. Anthony would think he had abandoned him. Would his soul mate ever forgive him?

Loki forced himself to turn away from Anthony and he didn’t allow himself to look back. Each step felt like a knife piercing his heart.

**End of Arc One**

**Author's Note:**

> This story has been sitting on my computer for quite some time. I wasn't sure whether to post it or not, but finally decided I should. I hope you enjoyed it. I am a slow writer so the next story will take some time.


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